Today I want to tell you a personal little story that I hope may be uplifting for those of you struggling to find hope, or even a reason to go on right now.
After the loss of my husband I became depressed and did not think I could ever, or would ever be happy again. It just seemed totally unbelievable and downright impossible.
I remember my doctor trying to find a reason for me to be happy and he said “what about grandchildren?”
In that moment, the prospect of grandchildren meant nothing to me ( yet I love kids) I interpreted what he was saying as “your grandkids will replace your husband” and I resented him for that. But the thought of future grandchildren could not even stir a flicker of hope or excitement in me – my world had ended and nothing could illuminate the wreckage inside of me.
Fast forward 6 years….and recently I had my adorabe little grandaughter stay with me for a night. We had such a fun time together. When she went back home, I got a text from her dad saying she told him “she could come to grandma’s and stay 3 nights next time because I know grandma loves me” 
When I read that I was flooded with emotion and tears of such delight as well as much sadness. My heart was flodded with immense joy and such a profound sense of gratitude for the blessing of having her in my life. Yet it was a mixture of joy and sorrow intertwined. The joy stems from witnessing the beauty of new life, the innocent laughter, and the unconditional love that my grandchildren have bought into my world.
Yet, within that joy, there was such a profound sense of loss. It was the melancholy realization that my late husband will never have the chance to hold them in his arms, or to hear their heartfelt giggles.
Yet, within this sadness lies resilience and gratitude. It is the acknowledgment that although my late husband may not physically be present, his spirit continues to live on in my heart and within the stories I can share with my grandchildren. It is the recognition that love transcends time and space, and that the bond we shared will forever be a part of my grandchildren’s lives, even if they will never have the chance to meet him.
So why have I bothered telling you this story?
Well I wanted to encourage you and give you hope to hold on to. While these words may not instantly erase the sorrow, they aim to offer a glimmer of encouragement and hope amidst the darkness.
When life feels like it has come to a halt due to grief, it’s essential to acknowledge that the pain you’re experiencing is valid and deeply felt. Here are a few reminders:
Embracing the bittersweet:
Allow yourself to feel the full spectrum of emotions that grief brings. While the sadness may be overwhelming, there can also be moments of joy and connection. It’s okay to experience both, as they co-exist in the complex tapestry of grief.
Honouring the legacy:
Remember that your loved one’s presence lives on within your heart and memories. Find solace in cherishing the moments you shared and carrying their spirit forward in your own life. In doing so, you continue their legacy and keep their essence alive.
Connecting through shared experiences:
Seek comfort in the understanding and support of others who have experienced grief. Engage with support groups, counselling, or online communities where you can connect with individuals who truly empathize with your journey. Their stories and guidance can provide encouragement and a sense of belonging.
Embracing resilience:
While it may feel as if life has lost its purpose, remember the inherent strength within you. Grief is a testament to the depth of love shared, and by persevering through the pain, you can discover newfound resilience and inner growth.
Embracing self-care:
Prioritize self-care during this challenging time. Engage in activities that bring you solace and peace, whether it’s spending time in nature, journaling, practicing mindfulness, or seeking professional support. Taking care of yourself emotionally, physically, and mentally can help restore a sense of balance and hope.
Embracing hope in new beginnings:
While grief may feel all-encompassing now, it doesn’t mean that life won’t hold new opportunities and moments of happiness in the future. As time passes, healing takes place, and you may find yourself open to new experiences and connections that can bring light back into your life.
Remember, the journey through grief is deeply personal, and healing unfolds at its own pace. Reach out to me for support, be gentle with yourself, and allow the love and memories of your loved one to guide you towards a place of hope and renewed purpose.
Till next time
Much love ♡
Ally
